HyperLocal's official mascot, resident site therapist, and the most professionally dressed llama in the SaaS industry.
Your bounce rate doesn't define you.
Frank wandered into the HyperLocal office one Tuesday afternoon wearing a tweed vest, a polka-dot tie, and an air of quiet authority. Nobody questioned it. Nobody asked where he came from. He simply sat down at an empty desk, placed a small succulent next to the monitor, and began reviewing wireframes.
Within a week, bounce rates dropped 40%. Not because of any technical change — Frank just made everyone feel heard. He nodded thoughtfully at broken layouts. He hummed softly at slow load times. He occasionally spit at designs he didn't like (an honest but effective feedback mechanism).
Today, Frank serves as HyperLocal's official Site Therapist. He counsels lost 404 pages, mentors confused nav menus, and provides emotional support to anyone who's ever deployed on a Friday. He is the calm in the storm. The fleece in the fabric of our company.
The vest is tweed. Always tweed. Frank has standards.
Office hours: whenever you need him (or whenever there's hay).
His name tag says "FRANK" because he always tells it like it is.
He was hired as an intern. Promoted himself.
Hobbies include judging your font choices and eating grass.
Practices mindfulness. Teaches it to 404 pages.
Legal Disclaimer: Frank is not a licensed therapist in any jurisdiction that recognizes llamas as healthcare providers. His advice, while emotionally resonant, should not replace professional counseling, actual debugging, or reading the documentation. Side effects of interacting with Frank may include improved morale, spontaneous laughter, and an inexplicable craving for hay.
